Friday, June 23, 2006

It's All In The Timing....

This is what I think....

I think everybody in America ought to get a backhoe, dig a giant hole, back their Hummer into it, cover it with dirt and call that a bomb shelter, because we're going to need some shelter from the coming storm.

All week we were treated to the Republicans clarifying for us dummies, you know, the Americans who want to see a timetable for getting out of Iraq and who don't support the war....what do they call us? Oh, yeah, THE MAJORITY!

The Republicans clarified for us how getting out of Iraq would be cutting and running, and would be a slap in the face to all those heroic sons and daughters who have already died there trying to force freedom down the throats of an ungrateful nation.

They told us again and again how the War on Terror can't be run as a criminal investigation, but can only be won militarily.

And, as expected, the will of the President prevailed over the will of the People, and Congress approved resolutions supporting the war and defeated resolutions calling for redeployment. It didn't even matter that the Iraqi government itself has asked for a timetable for US withdrawl.

And people in Miami were arrested for plotting to blow up the Sears Tower.

Well, OK, then. There is a terrorist threat, and based on what we learned from the Republicans this week, there is only one course of action we can take.

We have to pre-emptively invade America.

These were American citizens, living in America, so it is clear that the US is harboring terrorists bent on attacking America. After September 11th, a domestic terrorist INSIDE the US used ANTHRAX, a known WEAPON OF MASS DESTRUCTION on our own people. The first anthrax death was in...FLORIDA. Now, there is no proof that these American terrorists were linked to that attack, or that they possess further stockpiles of anthrax...but they haven't proved they don't, and until they do, the danger is clear. Nor has this group of American Christians, who are--by their own admission--bent on creating a second 9-11, proven to anyone's satisfaction that they aren't attempting to aquire nuclear weapons. And even if Al Qaida had nothing to do with them, the FBI agent posing as Al Qaida got them to be very interested in Al Qaida support, so if Al Qaida were interested in helping homegrown terrorists, we know homegrown terrorists would accept that help.

My God, are you blind to the risks here? Is your love of logic and the law worth the deaths of millions of Americans? And here, I mean the innocent Americans, not the Americans who want to kill Americans, because obviously Americans who want to kill Americans should be killed by Americans before they can kill any Americans.

Its simple.

Let me put it to you this way. If the Republicans are right, and they have to be, because otherwise God wouldn't let them bein power, we will never stop these evil doers with any method short of full scale military invasion. That's how we won in Afghanistan, and that's how we're winning in Iraq. The path is clear. We now have to invade ourselves....or at the very least, we have to invade Florida.

It doesn't matter that law enforcement uncovered the plot and thwarted it by arresting them. So what? Don't let these criminals try to sidetrack you from the mission at hand. Military action is the only effective tool against terror and it has to be used before smoking gun turns out to be a mushroom cloud.


And just like soldiers in Iraq can't always distinguish between civilians and insurgents, how are we supposed to know for certain which Floridians are the good guys and which are smiling at us because they're picturing how we'd look with radiation poisoning after their dirty bomb goes off in our living room? Better safe than certain, that's our national post 9-11 motto.

Because you can't be 100% cetain. And you're putting the entire nation at risk if you even try.

Floridians, you are either with us or you are with these god-loving, bible carrying, militant Christian extremists bent on destroying their own country. We have to fight them in Florida so we don't have to fight them in Illinois. How much clearer could it be?

And if we fight, we have to fight to win. All the way. Total victory. No retreat, no surrender, no way.

Nobody is pulling out of Florida until the job is done, so Jeb Bush, start stocking your spider hole....because....Freedom is on the march!


Blogger tugglespud said...

Invade Florida! Invade Florida! Yea Archie! Ah, I wish I could have seen this at No Shame, I could just imagine your facial expressions and vocal inflections...lovely! Nice work! - Tuggle

4:52 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Looked at first blog and realized how many I hve missed.

Perhaps the most irritating thing this week was the carefully planted story(lies, for all I know) about how, although the day before the Pentagon announced that General so and so was not planning drawing down the number of troops, etc., the Pentagon was (wink wink) pulling back 17,000 pieces of equipment to the United States or at least out of Iraq, for repair and refurbishing and diestribution to either our National guard and reserves (no doubt for Mexican border control and second-time occupation of New Orleans) and giving to the new Iraqi forces. And of course (wink, wink wink quite evident in even the staid Times) the army would not be withdrawing this stuff unless
and except it was planning to withdraw troops (really, really really) or at least greatly scale back the areas for which it was responsible.

See, said the Pentagon, those of you with discernment, you know we are leaving Iraq.

Now, first of all, taking back a bunch of hand-done re-armored Humvees and such that (at least as to Humvees) hvae a disconcerting tendency to roll over and crush those inside does not equate to pulling back troops. It equates to getting rid of old and worn out equipment.

And, second, I have heard before stuff about reducing our ground committment in favor of the actual population being on its on -- That is what we said in 73 and 74 before the collapse of Vietnam in 75, and it is what allies have always said before rolling their allies captive to their own land into the ditch.

It is shameful what is occuring, but a pre-emptive war done on Cheney's one per cent theory, of course, started in moral shame.

5:43 AM  
Blogger frstlymil said...

War on Florida. Brilliant!!!!!

5:45 PM  

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